Dear Uncle Sam -

Herewith, please find enclosed half a ream of shit that your lackeys at the IRS will not read and a check which you will cash and draw against my account the same day.

With the money I realize that you must:

1. pay the bureaucratic offices full of accounting wash-outs at the IRS,
2. bail out the banks to whom you lend money at 0% and return the favor to me at 5% + fees, yet are no more credit-worthy than Buttercup and I are,
3. give tax credits to the fiscally irresponsible dopes across the land, thereby incentivizing their over-reaching under effort backed life styles,
4. back door bail out Greece through the IMF which you finance over 16% of,
5. steamroll insurance legislation fully aware that the same assholes who couldn't afford it before will not be able to pay the "fines" for not having it now,
6. top up the government pension fund,
7. and, win the hearts and minds of the Afghans...again.

When you're all done with that, think you can funnel a few bucks back our way so the City will fill the potholes on my street?

Thanks in advance.